Torn
by LoneStar50
Summary: This is about the journey of April Carver and her will to live.
1. Chapter 1

April's view:

April couldn't ever imagine that her life would come to this. She thought this could never happen to someone like her. It didn't feel real until she stepped into the hospital and got hooked up to machines. Despite everyone stopping by to check on her, no one could fill the void that was eating at her, Leo. She needed him in her life despite what she said last week. There was no one else who understood what she was going through than him. He hadn't made his appearance and didn't know if he would.

It was nice to see Dominic appear out of nowhere to support her in this tough dilemma but she wasn't surprised to see him hurt. After telling him that she's known since the first date, he looked hurt. He couldn't believe that she wouldn't tell him what was going on in her life since the relationship evolved. Things didn't happen the way she would have liked but that was her decision and now she is paying for the consequences.

Lying in bed, medication pumping her veins, she thought she was seeing people. These hallucinations were becoming more real to her. Seeing her father and hearing those words from him scared her even more. She had to get out of there. It was scary to even contemplate what her father's meaning meant. She had no clue where she was going but somehow ended up at the church.

Sitting down on the bench and reflecting her life, the one person who she hoped would come and break her out of the hospital came. Leo, her knight in shining armor appeared. She couldn't have been happier to see his face. Instead of him helping her leave the hospital, he got her to stay. Leo was able to convince her that fighting for her life is what she really wants. He knew the first time he saw her that she wasn't going to give up on herself and that's why he liked her.

Leo deliberately left her in the hallway so he could get his own bearings. What he revealed to her made her heart flip. He hadn't forgotten that night, but he didn't think that he was good for her. Instead of giving her the option to choose who she wanted to be with, he had made the decision for her. He wanted her to bet on "Dominic."

I thought seeing Dominic in the hospital would make things better for me but I was wrong. Things just got more complicated. He wasn't too receptive towards me after learning he was the last person to know the truth. I didn't have time to worry about though. It was time that I focused on my recovery.

Seeing Jackson, Gerald and my dad in my dream made me realize how lucky of a person I really am. They weren't given the opportunity to live another moment. There life was taken away from them. I know that I'll have my up and down moments, but I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. I will beat this cancer and I will survive. I will be one of the lucky ones to share my story.


	2. Chapter 2

Leo:

I didn't expect to get that phone call after last week's fallout but I'm glad that I did. Seeing April in the chapel and looking so fragile made me want to take back everything I said to her when I was in the hospital. I didn't mean to hurt her feelings, but I felt that was the only way I could get her to leave my room. I didn't want her pity after what happened to me and I sure didn't want someone to care.

As I walk down the aisle, all the anger and resentment I had towards her flew out the window. She was just a shadow of the woman who came in here last week and spurred me on. It was like the light had gone out of her eyes and she didn't have a reason to live anymore. When she stared at me, it was almost like she could see within my soul. I knew what this meant and I wasn't going to let her go down the same path as I. April had given up and some part of me knows it's because of what I did.

It brought back my sense of reality when she started to talk about me breaking her out of the hospital. I thought it was the funniest thing, but she was serious. I guess we were Bonnie and Clyde now. We were not only cancer buddies, but outlaws on the run. As much as that thought appealed to me, I declined her offer and I could tell she was surprised. She pointed out that I'm Leo Hendrie and I was a law breaker.

This was different this time around though. There was something that resonated within my soul. The idea that April saw me that way made me realize how much I've been unfair to her. She was only seeking out someone who she could talk to about her situation. I know how hard it can be to have someone always looking over your shoulder and thinking they know what's best for you. Unless you're living it, you can't understand.

I finally have that pep talk with her and convinced her that giving up is the wrong thing to do. She was destined to fight for her life, if not for herself but those that are around her. Her family for one loves her to death and they would be devastated if you didn't "try." The tears start to flow from her eyes and I couldn't sit back anymore. I pulled April towards me and brushed my fingers on her face to wipe the tears away. I knew that I had to get her back to her room as I feared that her family wondered where she had gone. That's the one thing between her and me. She has family that care.

Picking her up and carrying her out to the hallway, I slowly let her down. I looked down at her one last time and told her to not be scared. Things were going to be alright. I told her that I was only a phone call away. April closed her eyes and that's when I knew I had to leave. Seeing her in this light made me realize that I want the same thing. I want to fight for my life. I just want to do it on my own terms.


	3. Chapter 3

Torn-3

April:

The conversation with Leo had drained me out completely. I just wanted to crawl back into my bed and get some sleep. It was too good to be true though. As soon as I came back into my room, my mom was fussing all over me. I hadn't been gone that long I had told her. It would have been better if I had run away. I wouldn't have to deal with her smothering me right now. I finally got settled and humored her for a while. It was getting late and I knew visiting hours would be over soon. I couldn't wait to have this place to myself. Unknown to me, I was going to have a sleepover. The doctor said it would be okay to have someone else stay in the room with me. I hadn't counted on that person until she walked through the door.

Beth:

This was going to be a fun night. It was just going to be the girls hanging out and we could talk about the guys in our life. I couldn't wait to find out what in the world is going on with her and Leo Hendrie. She may think I don't know, but I can tell from her reaction when she talks about him. Her face lights up like she got a great Christmas present. I think they would make a great couple. They balance one another out.

April/Beth:

"Surprise…It's me April. I'm your roomie for the night."

"OMG, I had no idea. When did this happen?"

"Well, I'm not sure who set this up for you, but that person was adamant that you get a good night's sleep and that you were struggling to get some zzz's."

April started to think about the conversation she had with people earlier in the day and the only person who came to mind was Leo. It couldn't be. There was no way he could have pulled this off right?

"I'll have to thank the person who set this all up once I find out."

"Well we can ask the nurse when she comes in here. I'm sure she won't have a problem telling you."

As soon as Beth said those very words, a nurse came on through the room and checked out her vitals. April was hesitant to ask the nurse but decided to give it a shot anyways.

"Excuse nurse, I was wondering if you knew who set this all up. I was surprised to get a sleepover."

The nurse looks back at her before deciding whether to tell her the answer or not. After thoughtful consideration, she decides to let her know. "It was Leo Hendrie who requested this for you."

"Thank you for telling me."

Beth turns to April and says "Wow, that guy must really like you."

"I have to call him and thank him Beth. "

"What are you going to say to him?"

"I'm not sure exactly."

The nurse had been listening to their conversation and butted into it. "I couldn't over hear you talk about Leo Hendrie. He's not going to be available for a while."

"How do you know this?"

"Let's just say I have on good authority that he will be busy for quite a while. There is no need to worry though. Enjoy the sleepover."

April and Beth thought that was weird. Neither one of them got what she was saying or not saying. April noticed her phone had lit up, letting her know that she had a message waiting. She dialed her phone and put it on speakerphone. It was Leo's voice.

"April, if you are getting this right now that means I did my job. You should be hanging out with your best friend enjoying your slumber party. Anyways, the doctors are prepping me for surgery. Hope to see you soon. If I don't, I just wanted to let you know that I love you. I think I fell in love with you the first time I met you. "


	4. Chapter 4

Torn-4

April/Beth:

"I knew it April. I told you that Leo had feelings for you & that voicemail just proved it."

"What if he doesn't make it Beth? How do I keeping fighting to live? He's not just my cancer buddy. Leo means more than that to me."

"It sounds like you have strong feelings for him April."

"I think I fell in love with him and I didn't know it. It wasn't until I received this phone call and the idea of never seeing him again hurts me."

"Shh…don't think like that April. Leo will be back before you know it. The hardest part is waiting for him to come out of surgery."

"I would feel so bad if he didn't make it. I'm the one who was on him to do the surgery. If it wasn't for me, he wouldn't be in there. He told me that he had his life mapped out. What if I screwed that all up Beth and he come back as a vegetable or he doesn't remember the simple things anymore?"

"April, you can't think like that. It's Leo and he's never let you down before. You can't get yourself all worked up. You have to be strong and brave for him when he gets out of surgery. It's going to be your face that he is going to want to see."

"Thank you Beth for trying to cheer me up but I can't help be on edge until I know."

"You need to get some sleep April so you'll have the energy. Leo would want that for you."

"Okay, but not before we say a little prayer for him."

Beth and April pray for Leo's surgery and that he makes it out alive and well. April snuggles deeper into her cover trying to cover up her weeping for Leo. Beth looks to the ceiling and prays with all her heart that Leo makes it because if he didn't, she wasn't sure that April would be able to handle the fallout.

…

Leo:

I felt good going into the surgery and getting my feelings off my chest. I finally told April how I felt about her and I can only imagine the look of surprise when she got the sleepover with Beth. I know how much she needed her and with me being in surgery, it would be easier for her to deal. It just breaks my heart that I couldn't see her one last time before I went in. I didn't want her to feel guilty if I didn't come out 100% because ultimately it was my choice to do the surgery. I pray that everything will be alright and I'll get to see the angel who has brought happiness to my life.

….

It had been a couple of hours since Leo had gone into surgery and April kept waking up. She was going in and out of sleep and it was annoying her because she felt helpless. She wanted to know what was going on but couldn't. There was no way the nurse on duty would give her any information. April didn't like this one particular nurse because Leo hadn't been paying attention to her & was focusing his attention on April. She hated woman that were catty and jealous for no apparent reason. It wasn't like April and Leo was a couple. Looking over to the right, she saw that Beth was passed out. She felt bad for Beth because she had to deal with April's emotions and they were running hot and cold at the moment. No guy had ever affected her like this, not even Dominic. April knew she wasn't going to be able to go back to sleep and decided to get out of her bed and take a walk down the hallway. It might clear the cobwebs and see wouldn't have to just see the 4 walls of her room.

As April made it to the hallway, her ears perked up when she heard one of the nurses talking about Leo. She was curious and decided to eavesdrop on the conversation when she knows she shouldn't. It wasn't her fault that they didn't know anyone was in the hallway. As she listened, one of the nurses had said that it's a shame that it had to come to this. Leo Hendrie deserved better than this. She wasn't even sure the surgery would help him. Another nurse then spoke and April's name was spoken. The second nurse said Leo wouldn't have done the surgery if not for her. She pretty much confirmed April's fear that if Leo's surgery wasn't successful, that it was all her fault. April slinkier back to her room and tried to make it to the bathroom but couldn't hold it in. She was feeling nauseous and puked her guts out. The thought of Leo not making it and the blame on her just intensified.

Beth woke up due to the noise and couldn't believe what was happening before her eyes. April was puking out and it wasn't just vomit. Blood was seeping from her and she didn't know what to do. She was so freaked out and paralyzed at the moment. It wasn't until April collapsed and she screamed that someone came into the room. The doctor and nurse immediately got April on the bed and were tending to her. They told everyone who wasn't family to get out and Beth rushed out as fast as her feet could take her. She was watching the scene unfold before her eyes and knew this one time her family would forgive her for calling them at this late hour.

…..

Beth/Uncle George:

She tried calling her mom and sister but no one was picking up. The only other person was her Uncle George who she had somewhat of a relationship with. He was still family though and he was a doctor. He would know what to do. Beth called him and the line kept ringing. Finally after the 4th ring someone answered.

"Hello"

In a panicked voice Beth asked "Is this April's Uncle George?"

"Yes this is him. May I ask who is calling and from where? 

"This is April's best friend Beth. I'm at the hospital and I tried calling her mom and sister but no one answered. April needs you now. She collapsed in her room and was vomiting blood. The doctors are currently working on her as we speak. Please hurry."

"I'm on my way. Let me know if anything changes."

George got dressed right away and drove down the highway. This couldn't be happening again he told himself. April's too young and he wasn't sure Sarah could sustain losing another person close to her heart.


	5. Chapter 5

Torn-5

Uncle George:

He was flying down the highway driving at excessive speed. The frantic call from April's best friend ignited a fear he hadn't felt in a really long time. The signs were all there and he didn't want to believe it with his own eyes. April convinced him as an Uncle that she was better, but as a doctor he shouldn't have believed her. Patients all the time come up with reasons and he disregarded her because she was family too him. If anything should happen to her, he wouldn't be able to live with himself.

…

Leo/April: (Out of body experiences)

"_Where am I and what am I doing here? What's going on?" April panics._

"_Hi April. I see you've decided to hang out with me. If I didn't know any better, you were stalking me."_

"_Leo, is that really you? Where are we? I thought you were in surgery."_

"_Follow me. It's okay sweetheart, I won't bite." Leo smiles with a wolfish grin._

_April follows Leo and he reaches his hand out for her. She puts her hand into his and they come into a room that she's never been in before._

"_Leo, where are we? What if someone finds us in here? I can't explain it."_

"_Relax. No one is going to find us here. They've got their hands full at the moment."_

"_What do you mean?"_

_Leo opens the door and she can't believe what she's seeing. It's her lying down on a metal gurney and they are trying to revive her._

"_What's going on and why is my body on the metal gurney?"_

"_It looks like you collapsed April and they are working on saving your life. I leave you for one afternoon and you've given up. I'm so disappointed in you April…tsk tsk."_

"_Leo that's not funny. Beth, OMG, she is going to be frantic. I have to tell her it's going to be okay."_

"_April, she can't hear either one of us. Were spirits. If you want to ease your mind, we can look in on Beth to make sure she is okay"_

"_Leo, this isn't real. You're in surgery right now trying to get rid of that tumor. You can't die on me. I need you to come back."_

_Leo looks at April and notices how upset she is. He didn't want to tell her that things weren't looking very good for him. The procedure was harder than they anticipated and it was a 50/50 chance he would survive._

"_April, look at me. I'm going to be fine. They are just getting junior out of my head and stitching me up. It'll be like old times. We can go back to hanging out and you annoying me. Stop worrying so much."_

_They arrive at the room and April is anxious to go in there to see how her best friend is doing. Leo hesitates for a moment to prepare him for what April was about to experience. He knew that she would lose it once she saw the picture in front of her. He opens the door to her room and they step in. April immediately runs over to where Beth is and then looks back at him._

"_Leo, Beth is in pain. She looks so frazzled and upset. I have to help her."_

"_April, she can't hear or see you. There is nothing you can do for her right now. All you can do is watch."_

_Beth is crying her heart out and no one else is there with her. April started to question what was going on. Why wasn't anyone else there?_

"_Where is my family Leo? Why haven't they been contacted about what happened to me? What's going on?"_

"_April, she won't be alone. There will be someone soon who will be joining her in the room. Just give it a minute." They both wait it out and the person who came through the door isn't who she expected. _

"_Uncle George. He's there with Beth. He looks so distraught Leo. It's almost as he got the news that I'm dead. She watches as her Uncle George takes Beth into his arms and comforts her." _

"_You aren't dead sweetheart. Beth was distraught because she was the one who found you and the only person she could get ahold of was your Uncle George."_

"_When is this over Leo? I can't watch this anymore. It's killing me inside to see this happening."_

"_All you have to do is fight for the will to live April and you'll wake up. Don't give up on yourself. Your family and friends need you."_

_April turns to Leo. "What about you?"_

"_I promise to be there when you wake up April. I'm fighting for not only myself, but for you too. I want us to give us a chance. It's time to go back to that room."_

_They both walk down the hall and April looks back one more time. "I'll see you on the other side Leo." She smiles at him and walks through the door and jumps back into her body._

…_._

Dr. White/Nurse Brown:

They are trying to revive April and just when they were about to call it. April wakes up. She's gasping for air and is crying out for Leo. They immediately rush to her and put oxygen on her to help her breath. They couldn't believe what just happened. She was essentially on her death bed.

….

Dr. White/Beth/Dr. Carver (George):

There was a knock at April's room and George immediately ran to open it. He noticed Dr. White and opened the door wider for him to come in. Beth noticed the doctor and was anxious to hear any news about her best friend.

"Hi, I'm Dr. White. I'm here to give you an update on April Carver."

"Hi Dr. White. I'm Dr. George Carver and this is my niece's best friend April. How is she?"

"April was able to be revived. We currently have her on oxygen to help her breathe earlier. It was by the sheer grace that she woke up in time. Interesting thing though. She mentioned a name when she woke up, Leo. Any chance if that is her boyfriend, co-worker or family member?"

George didn't have any idea. Beth spoke up and said "It's Leo Hendrie. He's currently in surgery and she was extremely worried about him the last time I spoke to her. He's a really good friend of hers."

Dr. White spoke up "It makes sense that she got herself worked up. All that stress probably contributed to her anxiety. I'm going to keep her under observation for a while to make sure she's okay. Dr. Carver, as a doctor I'm sure you understand. Beth, I promise she'll be back soon." Dr. White leaves and George turns to Beth.

"How long has April and Leo Hendrie been friends?"

"It's been a while. I believe since she found out she had cancer. She met him at a support group and he's been helping her come to terms with her leukemia."

"It sounds like he's been really helpful to her."

"Dr. Carver, I know that he's got a bad reputation, but he's nothing like that. I've met him and he's actually very caring and thoughtful towards April."

"It sounds like my niece trusts him a lot."

"I think she's in love with him. She said she didn't know what she would do if she ever lost him. April would blame herself if Leo died."

"How come?"

"She encouraged him to get the surgery for himself, for his brain tumor. Her biggest fear is that he isn't the same person as he once was to her."

"I see. I'm going to step outside and try to get a hold of April's mom. She needs to be told what happened."

"Dr. Carver, thank you for getting her so quickly. I know that April will thank you."

"There is nothing more important than my niece."


	6. Chapter 6

Torn-6

George/Brenna:

George tries calling Sarah's cell phone and she isn't answering. He assumes that she is avoiding him after everything that's happened between the two of them. This was his niece though and he had to push that aside and focus on the April. He decided to call Brenna instead and hoped that she wouldn't turn him away as easily.

"Brenna, this is your Uncle George. Don't hang up."

"Uncle George, what do you want?"

"Are you with your mom by any chance?"

"Yes. She's driving the car. Were headed to the mall."

"I need you to listen to me for a minute. April collapsed at the hospital."

"What do you mean April collapsed? Is she alright?"

"Just come over here and I'll explain everything."

"We are on our way."

George feels better knowing that the hardest part was done. Now he had to focus on finding out what in the world caused April to collapse like she did. This called for some favors.

….

April/Dr. White/Nurse Brown:

She heard the voices in her room and tried to look at the people who were talking. All she knew was that commotion was giving her a headache. There was nothing more than wanting to curl up and fall asleep in the bed. Then she remembered…Leo. She had to check on Leo to make sure he was okay.

"Leo"

"April"

"Leo"

"April, this is Dr. White. I'm here with Nurse Brown."

"Leo. I need to see Leo."

"Mr. Hendrie is busy right now."

"He promised me"

"Who promise you April?"

"Leo. He said he would be waiting for me."

"When did you talk to Leo?"

"Earlier. He and I walked in the hallway."

"April, that's impossible."

"Why?"

"Get some rest April. Well talk when you get better."

April fell asleep and that's when Nurse Brown spoke "It's going to be rough on her."

"I know Nurse Brown. It's not our place. She'll know soon enough by walking down the hallway."

…

George/Sarah/Brenna/Beth:

Brenna came blazing into the hospital looking for her Uncle George. Sarah wasn't far behind. George and Beth looked at the both of them and knew this was the moment of truth.

"What happened George?" Sarah asked

"Is April going to be okay?" Brenna asked

"I don't know all the facts. April's best friend Beth tried to get a hold of you guys but no one answered. She called me and then I came rushing down here. We just found out that she just woke up."

"Wow…no one has said anything else?"

"Nurse Brown and Dr. White have April sleeping at the moment. We'll find out more when she wakes up. It's a waiting game."

"George, there has to be something you can do. You're a doctor for goodness sake."

"Sarah, I can't work miracles."

"Mom, let's go talk to Beth. I'm sure she can tell us what happened."

Sarah and Brenna go over where Beth is sitting and notice how quiet she has been. Beth looks up and notices the two of them.

"I tried to stop her from worrying so much, but she couldn't. April was worried about him."

"Who was she worried about Beth?"

"Leo, Leo Hendrie."

"The politician's son?"

"Yes. They went to the cancer support group and from there the friendship grew."

"I believe it."

"She feels guilty right now. If anything happened to Leo, I'm not sure how she'd take it."

"They were that close?" Brenna asked

"I think she was in love with him and vice versa"

"Wait, what? This is the first time I heard of this." Sarah stated

"April convinced Leo to get the surgery for his tumor and this caused the chain reaction. She's scared he isn't going to make it out alive and it'll all be her fault."

"Oh, that's ridiculous Beth. My daughter knows better than that."

"Mrs. Carver, you didn't see her today. It was awful."

"Beth, thank you for calling my Uncle George. If it wasn't for him, we wouldn't have gotten the message."

"You're welcome Brenna. I'm going to go home and get some sleep. Call me when you get news."

"Of course." Brenna gives her a hug and Beth says goodbye to Mrs. Carver.

…

Dr. White/Nurse Brown:

"Dr. White, I'm not sure how much longer we can avoid the news. The parents will be here soon."

"Yes I'm aware Nurse Brown."

"This is going to be a media circus."

"It's a tragedy in itself I tell you."

"I couldn't even begin to imagine what they will be feeling."

"We need to focus on helping them as much as possible."

"Yes Dr. White."

"Nurse Brown, make sure April doesn't find out quite yet. I'm not sure she is ready to hear the news."

"Yes Doctor."

"Thank you Nurse Brown."


End file.
